desene animate si nu numai…ca tot omu’

De mic copil am fost fascinat de desene animate. Cand incepeau eram cu ochii lipiti de ecran, balele imi curgeau in coltu’ gurii, urechile mi se indreptau catre tv, degetele mi se infigeau in covor si stateam nemiscat pe toata durata vizionarii. Nu auzeam, nu vedeam, nu simteam nimic…in  afara de desenele pe care le asteptam cu sufletu’ la gura (de cate ori nu m’a luat lesinu’ ca sufletu’ scapa printre dinti).

Tin minte ca primele desene vazute fura cele cu Balanel si Miaunel, urmate Lolek si Bolek, unele date de bulgari – din perioada in care ii prindeam…ca pe urma si’a luat stoicicov mercedes si noi, cu bicicletele, n’am putut pedala destul de repede spre prostie…ca el – cu un baietel ce se plimba pe bicla toata ziua, apoi seria cu Emil – aci credeam ca’mi sunt dedicate si mereu strigam „Mami, incep io la televizor!” si bineinteles clasicele cu iepurasu’ si lupu’ – nu zait pagadii! . Apoi ceva s’a schimbat…nu mai imi placeau astea puerile, imi mijisera pe la buze pufi ce se transformara in mustati, aparura primele semne de acnee (si cate aparura!), incepura sa alerge hormonii prin mine…pfoai!

Si uite asa, descopar cel mai mare dezastru, cea mai mare calamitate umana…fetele si apoi femeile! Cum? Pai in desenele animate. Sigur, ca erau prezente si pana atunci, da’ eram prea ocupat cu joaca in tarana, fotbalu’ zilnic, leapsa, joaca de a eroii, etc. cu baietii de varsta mea. Primul impact fuse cu X-Men. Bai, desene bun, m’a fascinat. Da’ cand au aparut Storm, Rogue – astea erau bune, adica de partea alora buni –  si Mystique – si asta era buna, da’ de partea alora rai -, cu costumele lor mulate, corpul dezvoltat in toate cele, aulica mama ce mai baleam! Da’ totusi nu am putut sa nu remarc…de cate ori alergau fetele astea, nu sarea, nu se misca nimic pe acolo…pe cand in Baywatch, mama mama ce se mai zbenguiau diverse pe acolo…

Urmatorul soc pe linie fu in Batman…Poison Ivy, Batgirl (asta era mai pustoaica asa, mai de o sama cu mine), Catwoman, toate mulate, latex, dezvoltate…iar bale lasate prin canapea, ochi injectati si cat borcanele…Pentru astea 2 seriale si pt fetele din ele, ajunsesem sa chiulesc de la ore, nu mai dormeam noptile, ma parpaleam de dorul lor, doream sa le mangai (nu prea stiam io atunci cum sta treaba…nu ca acum as sti). Urmara Sailor Moon si amicele ei…urmaream doar partea cand se transformau (ce copil bolnav am fost)!

Apoi, pe la 12-13 ani, am descoperit-o pe Betty Boop. Cam batrana dama, da’ vorba aia „gaina batrana face ciorba buna cu…”, imbracata mereu mulat, mai voluptoasa, carliontata, eeehhh. Cam rasista ce’i drept: doar albi si negri? Cu vocea ei pitigaiata… A urmat Mica Sirena. Frumusica, fata de bani gata, fiica de rege…duce un pic a eba… tinerica, voce suava, dezbracata pe jumatate, ca cealalta jumatate acoperita de solzi nu ar fi dat bine in ochiu’ meu daca era descoperita. Am trecut si peste ea in clipa in care am realizat ca ea era juma femeie, juma peste…si atunci, mirosul ca mirosul, da’ aia cum se face?

Cam astea fura pasiunile mele pentru tipele din benzile desenate. M’am lecuit de ele, gandindu’ma ca e ciudata pasiunea mea: nu’s atat de masochist incat sa’mi placa astea mai batause si pline de puteri. 😆

Acum…sa’l ascultam pe individu’ de mai jos. Daca va incanta piesa, puteti face si karaoke…

https://sangerica.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/thirstin-howl-iii-dreams-of-fuckin-a-cartoon-bitch.jpg

Thirstin Howl III – Dreams of fuckin a cartoon bitch

It’s a wild one
As I sit back relax steam a blunt and sip a becks,
y’all know the words, y’all know the motherfucking words

[chorus]
Dreams of fucking a cartoon bitch
„I cant go to sleep cause i’m so damn scared”
Dreams of fucking a cartoon bitch
„Got me having these crazy nightmares”

[Thirstin]
To take it is tasteless
This dick will have Wonder Women pawning her bracelet
All for candy to little Orphan Annie
In front of Tweety Bird I back shot Granny
Me and Shaggy ran trains on Velma, Daphne
Nasty! She-Hulks pussy nappy
Little Mermaid her bra made of shells
I know the pussy good but I’m not trusting the smell
Olive Oils starving don’t even start me
Wilma and Betty wear the same shit to every party
Barbies got it all she can have my seed
The PowerPuff Girls got their name smoking weed
Raggedy Anne got no breasts and she cant dress
I’m not fucking with that ho she dont keep a clean crib

[chorus]

Brunhilda rides her broom in more than one way
Cheetara had some pussy thats untamed
Betty Boop is a racist she ain’t acting right
Only fucks characters thats black or white
Charlie Brown said Lucy twat is juicy holding her knee
Little girl? She’s really older than me
Jasmine from Aladdin we were reggae cabin stabbin
Pussy plant can finger fuck or get my hand in
When this occurs treat them like birds
Smurfette rode this dick thats bigger than her
I fucked them all and counting, loudly, proudly
Yogi Bear’s scared to have his bitch around me

[chorus]

Snow White ain’t too pure with this thing in her mouth
Cinderella saw a ball without me taking her out
Catwoman is a freak you can tell by her outfit
One finger four fingers in her meow mix (meow)
Any weathers clever I ain’ fearing shit
Storm fucks better while on her period
Considered marriage to Jessica Rabbit
Eat it, fucked her talked dirty in spanish
Pussy ate raw never safe y’all since 1950 some
thing Minnie Mouse wore the same drawers
Pumped Pocahontas, Jane, Judy Jetson
Where the fuck these cartoon bitches get their hair done?

[chorus]

Voi…ceva pasiuni pt masculii sau femelele din desene?